So Am I

Opinion writer Piya Raj Sukhani examines spirituality via this short story:


In the end, the only thing that will matter is how much love you have shared with all of creation

                                                                                                                                                                       – Sri Sathya Sai Baba


There was light everywhere; an atmosphere of inexplicable bliss, a presence of unconditional love.

My long awaited destination was nearing. My journey was almost over. My time was about to arrive.

And then, I was greeted by the fragrance of jasmine flowers.

This tangible wave of love swept passed me.

He was here.

He came towards me and I noticed that he wasn’t walking – it was more subtle than that. I looked in fascination of how gracefully he moved, with the hem of his white silken robe covering his feet, it almost seemed like he was gliding. As I watched closely, I caught a glimpse of his feet. I don’t know what  it was about them, but I was reminded of a lotus; soft, gentle and pure.

I looked up at him. His eyes, they had the softness of a thousand mothers. He smiled, and a cascade of tears streamed down my cheeks. I never witnessed anything that effulgent. He was dazzling- beyond the brilliance of a million suns.

He stood before me and I bowed down to him in obeisance. He placed his hand over my head in blessing, and as I was still kneeling down, I embraced him.

“I love you,” I said.

But I didn’t say that. I didn’t really speak. It wasn’t words, it wasn’t a language – there was no sound. It wasn’t even a thought. There was only the sweet melody of silence, and in that silence, there was only knowing; a knowledge that he knew what I knew.

“I always have,” he replied.

An amplified surge of peace came after he spoke, and while he didn’t utter anything out loud either, yet I understood, I knew.

He raised me by my shoulders, indicating that he wanted me to stand up. I rose up and he looked at my soul.

“I am going to tell you a secret,” he said.

And I will never, ever forget what he told me next.

After a meaningful pause he went on:

“You are God. And so am I.”

And that was the moment when everything fell into place.

I had been asleep for uncountable years, but I had finally woken up. All this was a dream.

There was no creation, only reflection.

Everybody, everything, everywhere – it was all me. All of creation was just like a mirror, a mirror that was finally cleaned from the dust accumulated over uncountable years. It was a mirror in which I finally saw my true self.

I was the embodiment of divinity. I was the only truth. Nothing existed.

I understood nothing, and so I understood everything.

I gleamed back at him, smiling in glory.

“I am the Supreme, Absolute, Indivisible,” I knew.

“You are me and I am you. I am I. And that is all that is,” I continued.

He nodded, beaming with his magnificence. He raised both his arms. I merged into him.

This was not a destination, because endless fun had just begun.

And there was light!


By Piya Raj Sukhani

Feature image source:

"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." (George Orwell, in Animal Farm, 1945)

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